Something has got to be done about annoying moviegoers. But I'm too timid to do anything myself. The most I'll do is move seats to get away from an annoying person, but I wish I had the guts to do more. What do other people do when confronted by such rudeness?
I know what I'm getting myself into if I go to a movie at Court St- answering cell phones and having conversations during the movie, chair kicking, and crying infants. But now even "art theaters" are getting bad. My grandparents haven't been to a movie in the theaters in years because people who go to movies annoy them. I used to think that was ridiculous, but maybe I'll just buy a huge TV to watch movies on and be done with the whole mess.
Recent experiences:
Tae Guk Gi
At the ImaginAsian
Three action movie fans behind Sujan and me marred this Korean War drama. These were the kind of guys who sit with an empty seat between them so no one will think that they are gay. These are the kind of guys who like to talk to each other during the movie and share such amazingly insightful comments like, "Dude, they destroyed the whole village!" These were the kind of guys who were there to see the film because maybe it would be as good as "Mission Impossible 2."
Sujan eventually turned around and asked them to stop talking. One guy responded, "Who's talking? I'm not talking" And then they continued to talk even louder. We should have moved seats. But that tactic wouldn't have worked because of the bored toddler who kept crying. By the way, this film is one of the most violent films I've ever seen. What are people thinking taking a two year old to see it?
End of the Century: The Story of the Ramones
At the Angelika
I was forced to listen to a middle-aged father force feed his bored teenage son information about the Ramones and also occasionally sing along to his favorite songs. Near the end of the film, Johnny Ramone's acceptance speech at the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame included the lines, "God Bless George Bush! God Bless America!" The movie crowd gasped and booed. The Republican fuck turned around to the crowd and smiled and remarked to his son, "Hah, he's one of us!"
The Brown Bunny
At BAM
Middle-aged asshole with his wife in front of Mitch and me. The movie started and he pointed at the screen (because obviously his wife couldn't read) and said, "Written, produced, and directed by Vincent Gallo!" Then he was one of those people who kept saying 'Mmmmm" loudly to let the audience know that he understand what was going on. Stay at home, and feel smart all you want, you fuck!
Assault on Precinct 13
At BAM
This wasn't that bad. It only lasted ten minutes or so. And I don't want to embarrass anyone because the culprit is a friend of mine. So I won't blame him. I will blame the damn movie theater. Nachos should not be movie food! Chips are crunchy and very very very loud when you eat them! But I guess it wasn't the theater's fault that my friend tidied up with a very loud rubbing together of his hands. Maybe I'm just being picky here.
Sunrise
At Film Forum
One person was crinkling a plastic bag for about ten straight minutes. One person continually was cracking his/her knuckles. And the young couple behind me kept whispering loudly to each other, making plot predictions, and singing along to the score. Why didn't I say something? I turned around and glared and shook my head a couple of times but rude fucking people tend to be oblivious as well.
My hero in this matter remains Chris M. At a showing of some 60's cult film in the East Village a few years back, there was a guy who knew every line of dialogue to the film. He kept stating the lines right before the actors did. Chris turned around, looked him in the eye, and asked him, "Do you really think THAT is enhancing my movie experience?" The guy mumbled an apology and shut the fuck up!
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7 comments:
jeremy remarks:
noises during movies are horrenous and nearly unavoidable now unless you're in france, so i've heard, or at my local theatre where i've had 3 wonderfully silent experiences.
the worst i ever encountered was during opening night of panic room at a mega theatre in rutland, vt. first off my pseudo-friends, who are friends no more, brought bags of potato chips to eat during the film. not only was the crinkling nearly unbearable but the smell of dill pickle chips filled the theatre immediately, making me nearly gag. then some other acquaintances showed up a few minutes late and ran in during the previews to whisper to us they would be attending another film. they were loudly "shushed" by several people around us.
okay, the film starts and two rows of teenagers make their presences known. the front row is all beeping cell phones and horny giggling. three rows behind us is a row of sullen teens, including one who was going through tobacco withdrawal. "i need a fucking cigarette" she kept repeating. she would repeat lines from the film so much that even her moron friends got annoyed. then she started saying "fucking aaaas-hole. fucking aaaas-hole" over and over. I was burning but my head turning and shushing was getting me nowhere. where were all the shushers who couldn't stand to have their previews slightly upset? finally, this guy right in front of me stands up, turns around and says "either shut the fuck up or get the fuck out." i was expecting a round of applause but it was dead silent as i internally cheered. he sits down, 10 seconds go by and then from behind me "Fuck...(dramatic pause)...You"
i nearly had a heart attack
i like dill pickles
don't forget the two loud and annoying girls who were eating gyros or falafels during assault on precinct 13. i thought they were much worse than our friend the culprit.
Wow. Not sure where to start. I was really liking this post, and identifying with it, as I am an avid proponent of telling people to shut the fuck up in movies and have long planned to write a treatise called People Who Talk Too Much about people who ruin movies and rock shows for everyone else...then I come to find that I am in fact indicted as one of these rude assholes by Listmaker himself.
Hm. Why am I hearing about this now for the first time? You could have mentioned something to my face. Not that I am pissed off, just peeved. I also am feeling a bit humbled and guilty, as I certainly never intended to be someone whose activities detracted from anyone else's movie enjoyment. It's a combination of emotions here in Whiskeyland.
I will be sure to never get nachos at any film I attend with you again.
But here is my defense:
1. You are talking about Assault on Precinct 13. A campy movie that everyone (except one person in our group) fully and rightly expected to be a yukfest going in. This is not art cinema, not riveting drama, not a film with serious emotion or hard-to-follow dialogue. It's a joke of a movie that should be enjoyed as such. Hence, I have a separate standard for it and movies like it as far as what I'm willing to tolerate in terms of distraction/audience participation. Maybe you don't, and that's fine.
2. I had not eaten dinner that night, and needed something relatively substantial. I was hungry as hell. Popcorn was not going to cut it, nor were Swedish fish. I got there late because of another engagement that was important and unavoidable. I walked in just as the previews would normally start, but there were no previews. Had there been, would you still have been annoyed? If so, too bad.
Man, you really stole my thunder with this. I am used to being the good guy in this whole evil moviegoer vs. righteous moviegoer dynamic, and you pulled that out from under me but good. A very loud rubbing together of my hands! Jesus, give me a fucking break. I know you were trying to be nice by not "outing" me, but man you really lambasted me good.
Guess I won't bother to share some of the wacky ways I've been distracted in movies, or the ways I've had the balls (unlike you, apparently) to actually call people on that shit, shush them and tell them to shut up and whatnot.
>Hm. Why am I hearing about this now for the first time? You could have mentioned something to my face.
Jim, I'm just giving you a hard time. I didn't mention it to your face because if I had at the time, it would have ruined your enjoyment of the nachos. I was more amused than anything by the loud crunching since it was coming from my lovable friend Jim.
>I will be sure to never get nachos at any film I attend with you again.
Not your fault as much as it is the movie theater's fault for serving them. It isn't a ballgame, but a movie.
>1. You are talking about Assault on Precinct 13. A campy movie that everyone (except one person in our group) fully and rightly expected to be a yukfest going in. This is not art cinema, not riveting drama, not a film with serious emotion or hard-to-follow dialogue. It's a joke of a movie that should be enjoyed as such. Hence, I have a separate standard for it and movies like it as far as what I'm willing to tolerate in terms of distraction/audience participation. Maybe you don't, and that's fine.
Good point, but loud crunching is loud crunching.
>2. I had not eaten dinner that night, and needed something relatively substantial. I was hungry as hell.
Also a good point, and it probably explains the ravenous sounds emanating from behind me.
> A very loud rubbing together of my hands! Jesus, give me a fucking break.
Come on Flood! I was just giving you a hard time! It was funny when you rubbed your hands. It was thunderous behind me and it is funny!
>Guess I won't bother to share some of the wacky ways I've been distracted in movies, or the ways I've had the balls (unlike you, apparently) to actually call people on that shit, shush them and tell them to shut up and whatnot.
See, that's the point- I am too much of a pussy to call people out. I think it is because I will then not able to enjoy the movie because I'll know that then I'll be the target of any badwill coming from them if that makes any sense. There was a reason I didn't mention your name- no one had to know it was you unless you mentioned it was you. How many people had any idea that we went to go see that movie together? You think Mitch gives a shit? And as far as calling someone out by name on a blog, how did that work for you with Chris?
I hope you are not too mad at me. I was just being silly. The other people I was pissed at. With you, I was amused. You are my friend and I thought it was funny. I do apologize if you are really pissed. That was not my intention. Please post your stories. Or call me out on something on your blog!
I'm not mad at you. I'm just sensitive. You caught me off guard so I got defensive.
I remember being conscious of the crunching at the time, and thinking I should apologize to Mitch afterward because he was sitting next to me. But I didn't realize that three seats away you were hearing it too! I guess you're right, nachos are not a movie food. You should write a letter to BAM.
jim, don't worry. he yells at me for chewing popcorn too loud ALL THE TIME. curmudgeon.
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