Anyway, this past weekend was a blur of booking trips to Asia, playing wiffleball, attending weddings, and drinking beershakes. More on those later. Although Youthlarge already has a full wrap of the food gossip on The Park Slope Gastronome.
But there's something on my mind this evening, other than the fact that I had to miss the Yankees-Mets game at Shea and work today because of my strained back from Sunday morning. Although my back problems did lead Hot Tub Eric to the quip of the weekend "You've got the back of an 80-year-old and the Cargo shorts of a 12-year-old."
No, what I ponder tonight has to do with the delivery of my NY Times.
Youthlarge and I have it delivered everyday. On occasion, it gets stolen. In the past, I've simply called the "customer care" folks at the Times, report that my paper has been stolen and ask for a credit. This has never been a problem. Although, when the Saturday paper is stolen, it is a bitch. Half of the Sunday paper is delivered on Saturday including Youthlarge's favorite part - the magazine.
This Saturday, the paper was stolen. Normally, that would lead to a breakdown on my end, but since I didn't have the time to do any reading anyway on Saturday, I was fine. The Saturday paper is the worst one to get stolent. Any other day, you can go the newsstand to replace it. But since half of the Sunday paper can only be attained through delivery, you are screwed when the Saturday paper is stolen.
I called the Times and asked to have the entire Sunday's paper delivered on Sunday. Simple, right? Well, I've tried that before but my delivery guy usually fucks that request up. He also has been known to deliver the paper even when I'm out of town and have requested a stop in delivery. But other than that and the occasional paper that misses the steps completely and lands on the stairs leading to the sinister basement of my building, he's been okay. I haven't had too many reservations mailing him a tip every December when he sends me a holiday card with a return envelope included.
Anyway, the woman at the Times told me that she would lodge a complaint with the delivery person. But I said that she shouldn't do that because I'm sure he had delivered it. However, since it was stolen, I wanted the entire paper redelivered the next day.
Sunday morning rolled around and at 6 am, our buzzer went off. None of us answer it (Hot Tub Eric was staying with us) but I had a sneaking suspicion that it was the newspaper guy getting his revenge on me by buzzing at 6 on a fucking Sunday morning! When we eventually made it downstairs to the paper, only the Sunday sections were included, rather than the advanced ones too. Typical.
Youthlarge and I decided to buy a paper because we wanted the whole thing. I called the Times and asked for credit on the entire weekend since we didn't get Saturday's paper and only half of Sunday's and felt compelled to buy a whole other Sunday paper. They had no problem with my request.
Last night, I was sleeping on the couch because I thought it would be better for my strained back. Guess who rang our buzzer, not once, but twice this morning at 5:30? Yup, the asshole newspaper guy. I looked out the window and saw him as he sauntered off of our steps down to the next apartment with his papers. What the fuck? What would he have said if I had answered the buzzing? How does he miss our steps when he walks right by them? My first thought was to go running down the block after him and give him a piece of my mind but my sore back told me that that was a bad idea. I thought maybe I'd call the Times and lodge another complaint? But for what purpose? So he can wake me up tomorrow morning at 5 am? Maybe call and make an anonymous complaint? Anyone have any advice?
All I know is that this fucker is never ever getting another tip from me at Christmas time.
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12 comments:
I think the Times are the idiots for telling him exactly who made the complaint. How do they know your delivery guy isn't some psycho about to be toppled over the edge by yet another complaint. By revealing the identity of the complainant the New York times have jepordised not only your delivery but also, potentially your safety.
That's fucked up. I would cease delivery and buy a copy from the newstand. I would also let the Times know what's been going on.
You should ask newspaperboy for career advice. He obviously doesn't let his bosses dick him around, even when he is in the wrong.
Fresh air is the best disinfectant- you should have caught up with him a laid the whole thing out. After all, you deliberately pointed out to the paper that he wasn't at fault. He still won't like you and if he has even elementary class conciousness he will see you as part of the great weight of upper middle class oppression keeping him down with your cargo shorts and Dysons, but at least he'll stop ringing your dooorbell.
"the great weight of upper middle class oppression keeping him down with your cargo shorts and Dysons"
I think Weasel just bumped us all up a social class or two.
Upper middle, nice, I might even wear a tie at your wedding.
Given that my barber describes himself as middle class I'm using standard American inflation.
Here's a tip: get up early on Sunday morning and wander right next door from your motel to Tapleys- the New York and Boston papers come up by plane to Bangor and are usually on sale by 9 or 10am. There are strictly limited quantities however- leave it too late and you might wind up with the Maine Sunday Telegram. While at Tapleys, be sure to get breakfast; it is greasy, hearty, and usually cooked by my friend Shane. Tell him you are up for the wedding and you might get extra home fries.
Stone Groove says:
Get the Washington Post.
Maybe he's trying to wake you up right when he delivers it so you can grab it before the paper thief.
Also: It's a losing battle, this situation. You should just cancel the subscription and buy from newsstand/read online.
This reminds me of a recent rant of yours concerning our Post Office service.
As we live two blocks from one another, I think we may have the same delivery guy. We have been missing papers recently too, including Saturday deliveries, which as you so carefully outlined, cause a unique problem. I don't think they are being stolen. I think our man is not up to the grind of the daily delivery schedule.
Also, I get up early on weekends and it annoys me that the paper often doesn't arrive until after 9:00 AM.
Advice: next time Saturday is missing call The Times as soon as you notice and ask for a redelivery that day. You can do that without speaking to a human which is always my preference.
Next: And I'm considering doing this myself, cancel delivery and just buy the paper yourself, at least for a few months. It's not winter, and a little morning walk will do wonders for your head – "Yeah, I'm in control of this paper thing," and your back.
mactech, whenever i call, they won't redeliver that day.
and i can't cancel - i get a 60% teacher discount. mactech, you should get in on that.
so i guess i should just grin and bear it since my paper is so cheap anyway. but it is the principle of the thing!
Maybe you should just sneak into you know whooney's apt., steal his newsies hat and then give it to YOUR newsie as a peace offering. I don't think this will result in better delivery service, but I do think it will help put an end to the early morning buzzing. Bzzz bzzz.
I'm with Slice, I think the purpose of the buzzing is to say, The paper's here, so now is your chance to grab it before the thief does. But obviously no sane person wants to wake up or be woken up at 5:30 am.
I get weekend delivery only and have also had problems with the Saturday portion. Still not sure whether it's been stolen or not delivered. My only reason for continuing to get delivery is that I get free access to the special Times online content, whatever it's called. I need my Krugman and Frank Rich.
no way does someone buzz you at 6 am on a sunday to be nice. give me a fucking break you apologists.
man jim and slice you guys crack me up.
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